A few months after my husband died a package arrived in the mail. In it was a little book. A sweet journal with shiny flowers and comforting words on the cover. A friend had slipped in a note with it that said 'You probably can't pray- can't breathe- can't think, but write- write to God- He will answer. It began in reluctance at first, mostly in anger and questions and anguish. But the answers have come. He has spoken over and over through seven additional journals since the first arrived in my mail box. In the midst of this journaling has come a precious gift. A refuge when the winds of pain howl and the dark clouds of grief over take me. This blog is a record of some of the most pivotal conversations between God and I from those journals. And hopefully more conversations to come. But these are not just thoughts and ideas and prayers. Those are in there. But it is first hand view of the unfolding of God's grace in my life. Of a new relationship with him. After walking with Jesus for 20 years it was obvious to me that I really didn't know him the way I thought I did. This is the story of a broken, bleeding, aching woman learning to really humble herself for the first time in her life to really know her God and to be known by him in the deepest places and to experience love like never before.
Friday, June 27, 2014
Why Blog??
This is a an ironic question for me. We live in the overwhelming abundance of a virtual world. Texting, Skype, Twitter, Facebook, Instagram, Snapchat. These are terms that are thrown around our house on a daily basis. They haven't meant a whole lot to me and I don't really have the patience or brain power to learn how to use them, although I do use email and have a Facebook account. Technology is really not my thing so publishing a blog isn't something I have pictured myself doing. In all honesty, it has taken me way too long to just figure out how to get my words onto this page and now I am not sure if anyone else will ever actually find it to read it. I love the face to face time I get with family and friends. I love to look into their faces while we talk, hear their laughter and their stories. I treasure every word we share. I think this is even more precious now that I am widowed. I live with a seventeen year old who while wonderful is not always the most thrilling conversationalist and let's face it, seventeen is an age where things revolve around you and only you. So my days are sometimes so quiet, the silence is suffocating so talking through a computer screen is very unappealing. But yet something has been calling to me for a while now to find a better way to preserve the details of this unfolding life.
A few months after my husband died a package arrived in the mail. In it was a little book. A sweet journal with shiny flowers and comforting words on the cover. A friend had slipped in a note with it that said 'You probably can't pray- can't breathe- can't think, but write- write to God- He will answer. It began in reluctance at first, mostly in anger and questions and anguish. But the answers have come. He has spoken over and over through seven additional journals since the first arrived in my mail box. In the midst of this journaling has come a precious gift. A refuge when the winds of pain howl and the dark clouds of grief over take me. This blog is a record of some of the most pivotal conversations between God and I from those journals. And hopefully more conversations to come. But these are not just thoughts and ideas and prayers. Those are in there. But it is first hand view of the unfolding of God's grace in my life. Of a new relationship with him. After walking with Jesus for 20 years it was obvious to me that I really didn't know him the way I thought I did. This is the story of a broken, bleeding, aching woman learning to really humble herself for the first time in her life to really know her God and to be known by him in the deepest places and to experience love like never before.
A few months after my husband died a package arrived in the mail. In it was a little book. A sweet journal with shiny flowers and comforting words on the cover. A friend had slipped in a note with it that said 'You probably can't pray- can't breathe- can't think, but write- write to God- He will answer. It began in reluctance at first, mostly in anger and questions and anguish. But the answers have come. He has spoken over and over through seven additional journals since the first arrived in my mail box. In the midst of this journaling has come a precious gift. A refuge when the winds of pain howl and the dark clouds of grief over take me. This blog is a record of some of the most pivotal conversations between God and I from those journals. And hopefully more conversations to come. But these are not just thoughts and ideas and prayers. Those are in there. But it is first hand view of the unfolding of God's grace in my life. Of a new relationship with him. After walking with Jesus for 20 years it was obvious to me that I really didn't know him the way I thought I did. This is the story of a broken, bleeding, aching woman learning to really humble herself for the first time in her life to really know her God and to be known by him in the deepest places and to experience love like never before.
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